Carole Baskin, Carl Icahn

Corporate raider and stock serial killer Carl Icahn has just submitted an unlikely bid to buy-out failing zoo and animal sanctuary Big Cat Rescue after shares tumbled on news that Don Lewis’ body has been discovered.

Don Lewis, the playboy ex-husband of Carole Baskin mysteriously disappeared in August 1997 after leaving his home to make an early-morning delivery at 6:00am. Authorities have had no leads on tracking down his killer until recently, when bones of a human male were unearthed underneath one of Carole Baskin’s tiger cages.

Share prices are to date 60% down after hitting all-time-highs of $350,000 shortly after popular Netflix documentary “Tiger King” was released. However, famed corporate raider and contrarian investor Carl Icahn sees room for optimism. We were able to obtain an exclusive virtual interview with Carl, who said…

“Well I don’t see what all the fuss is about? That Carole Baskin ran the zoo into the ground. Look at the metrics – sales per tiger is down 30% after she retired all the crippled ones, and the debt/assets ratio is at an all-time high after she took a write-down on those tiger cubs. Hopefully with some new management we can see the zoo boost its bottom-line and return a healthy profit for investors.”

Tiger King Joe Exotic released a statement saying:

“Well, I knew that Carole Baskin was a crook from the first time I saw her. Karma is coming for Carole I can’t wait to see her rot in jail.”

We were unable to obtain a comment from Carole’s current husband, Howard, as he is currently missing.

The story continues….