It came as a surprise to many that Donald Trump decided to visit the bronze statue of the late United States Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg that was unveiled Friday morning in Brooklyn. The two were often on opposing sides of policy and this would mark his first public appearance since leaving the White House.
Both local officials and artist duo Gillie and Marc, who designed the statue as part of their “Statues for Equality” series, which has already installed 10 sculptures of women around New York City, were hesitant to have Trump in house on opening day, but when his people pitched it as a ‘visit for unity’ they regrettably acquiesced.
Trump showed up 10 minutes after the unveiling started—and immediately made his way up towards the podium positioned neatly next to the statue.
Before security could close in, Trump grabbed the microphone: “Ohhhh, Ruthie, Ruthie, Ruthie… ‘Sweet Cheeks’ Ruthie…” Trumped turned his attention to the crowd, “What?! We are having a moment. At least I showed up! Where is Sleepy Joe? And you know what… Shame on you people. You are all probably just surprised I outlived her. Aren’t you? Well guess what? This is what 74 years of healthy living looks like.”
He then announced he was going to give Ginsberg her “dying wish” and stuck to her like a magnet, cupping and caressing the statue’s backside, before delivering a spine tightening lick that started on the neck of the statue and made it all the up above the eyebrows.
Security fired multiple tranquilizer darts, but Trump was unphazed and walked out under his own power. As he made the clearance he shouted back one last time, “I’ll finish you off next time, Ruthie. Scout’s honor!”