Stormy Daniels

WASHINGTON – Speaking from the heart at the Presidential podium, Trump unveiled that Stormy Daniels will fill the Ruth Bader Vacancy.  “I am pleased to nominate Horse Face, I mean Stormy Daniels to the Supreme Court Justice.”

The nomination came as a surprise due to the Trump scandal the erupted in 2018.  In late 2018, Daniels alleged she had sex with Trump during a celebrity golf tournament in Lake Tahoe in 2006.  Stormy told reporters that Trump’s kink was having his nipples twisted while she whispered “Putin” in his ears.

The Trump and Stormy sex scandal came just months after Melania, Trump’s third wife, gave birth to baby Baron.

“There are thousands of women I have slept with, but Stormy was the best.  To honor her ability to please me I offer Stormy Daniels the Supreme Court seat.”

Later that afternoon, Michael Cohen was seen paying off Daniels for her to refuse the nomination.  Michael later told reporters that Trump was more interested in having Brandi Love serve the Supreme Court seat.

In other news, Michael Avenatti was hired as the defending lawyer for Trevor Milton.  Avenatti swore he would take down the terrorist organization known as Hindenburg Research if that was the last thing he did.  Michael was later seen picking up soap that he dropped in the prison showers.