Longtime Jeffrey Epstein associate Ghislaine Maxwell, who was arrested last week on suspicion of involvement in his sex-trafficking allegations, has died unexpectedly while touring Bubba Wallace’s NASCAR garage.
According to unnamed sources speaking on behalf of Maxwell, the vilified socialite has always been a huge NASCAR fan – particularly of Bubba Wallace. Hearing this, FBI agents made the unusual move to allow her to tour Wallace’s garage before her court appearance on Friday.
But during the visit, Maxwell reportedly tripped on a banana peel and fell directly into the handle of the garage’s door pull, breaking her neck and killing her instantly.
The newly posted guards, who monitor Wallace’s garage 24/7 since NASCAR heroically identified the door pull as a hate crime several weeks ago, were both indisposed at the time of the incident. An unnamed source found both guards fast asleep, each holding a key into a complex mechanism designed to shut down the surveillance system only if both guards were present to monitor the feed while it wasn’t recording.
The FBI ruled no foul play in the incident, insisting that the guards must simply have both had a dream that involved opening a lock, simultaneously.
“This was nothing more than a bizarre accident that happened to take out one of the most sought-after reservoirs of criminal knowledge in the world,” FBI director Christopher A. Wray wrote in an as-yet-unpublished report.
He closed the report saying, “We’re happy to â€˜close the door,’ so to speak, on all this Epstein business and return to far more important investigations of notable criminal short sellers.”