Jo Jorgensen

Libertarian Presidential candidate Jo Jorgensen has surged in the polls recently, as she unveiled her new slogan “Do whatever the frig you want.”

And when she says it, she means it, folks.

She granted an exclusive interview with The Stonk Market, so I traveled to her hometown of Libertyville, Illinois to talk to Miss Jorgensen.

Sidebar: Her hometown is literally Libertyville. Is there anything more Libertarian than that?

Ok, back to the satire.

Now, Jo, may I call you Jo? Jo, what do you mean by “do whatever the frig you want?”

“I mean, do whatever, the frig, you want. Have you seen the movie ‘the Purge’? It’s like that, but instead of one day a year, it’s 365.”

So, you’re saying people can murder people whenever they want, and just get away with it?

“No, not unless you’re a cop, Russ. In that regard, it’s basically like today’s reality.

This extends to other aspects of life beyond killing. Do you want to smoke? Good, blow those Os in a baby’s face for all I care. Prostitution? Heck, I’ll order one to the Oval office. The Dems and the Conservatives are too worried about putting restrictions on you. I say, do what makes you feel good.”

I like that. And how do you feel about the recent Presidential debates? Do you wish you were up there?

“I do, Russ. It’d be a lot better than Donald just talking to himself. With Joe on the bench of the Supreme Court, it gets boring just watching Donny up there talking himself into a circle. He needs a female presence up there like in 2016, so that way he has someone to call a nasty woman. That stuff gets me off.”

You’re a nasty woman.

“Say it again, Russ.”

You’re a nasty woman.




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