After receiving numerous accreditations for his financial teachings at the Stonk Market University, Jose W.B. Dinero (Extraordinary Wealthy), formerly known as John W.B. Rich (Wealthy) is retiring in Khartoum Sudan to lead the construction of a brand-new Wendy’s franchise from the seat of his hydrogen-powered shitbulldozer (made by Nikola Corp. (LONG)).
Agreeing to give another interview with our idiotic press agency, he told us he refuses to sit on his lazy wrinkled behind all day and he has set a new life goal for himself: To give Senator Eloise Williams CFA, MBA, PHD (Doctor) the orgasm of a lifetime with his microscopically small wiener.
Jose intends to achieve the unachievable by injecting the same steroids as he gives to cows that will soon be converted to Baconators at his new Wendy’s restaurant. He also added that he will do, “everything it takes to make sure Eloise climaxes, just like I did everything I could to make the poors (dumbs) even poorer (dumber).”
Unfortunately, Jose W.B. Rich (Ridiculously Wealthy) had to end our interview prematurely because he felt the urge to spray a large amount of diarrhea out of his wrinkled crap hole due to eating 12 Baconators (appetizers as he calls them) at lunchtime.
Let’s just hope he doesn’t have to end his sexual endeavors with Senator Eloise Williams CFA, MBA, PHD (Doctor) prematurely. Because this would probably end up in another massive stonk market sell-off across the worldwide markets.