Millions flee LA as lock-down continues; housing prices collapse


Los Angeles – Millions have begun to flee Los Angeles as the lock-down now continues through July.  Furthermore, given that LA’s housing prices are some of the highest in the country, economists expect the housing market to collapse.

“I’m sick and tired of this lockdown.  I live in LA for the beaches, weather and girls,” Stanley Zuck said.  “I’m not going to pay these exorbitant prices to live in my house all year round.”

Stanley Zuck is one of the many LA residences who is beginning to flee his tyrannical local government for a less controlling state.  “Dude, I pay $4,000 a month for a studio apartment.  If I can’t go to the beach I’m out of this state.”

Erin, 26, a bartender said she is locked into a 2-year lease for a studio apartment at $6,000 per month with no way to pay it.  “I moved to LA for the sunshine and to pursue my acting career.  But now that everything is closed, I am jobless with late payments that continue to pile up every month.  I don’t know what to do.”

Millions of LA residences have acted – beginning to flee the entire state of California.  Local economist, Daryl, expects housing prices to start collapsing as the population rapidly decreases and mortgages begin to default.

To combat the population outflow, LA politicians are footing a new bill that will force anyone fleeing California to pay a $50,000 dollar exit fee and relinquish their pets to a kill shelter.

“Look,” a scummy LA Politician said.  “The $50,000 dollar exit fee will stop most of the poor people from fleeing our tyrannical state.  But what will stop 99% of people from fleeing is the bill that will force residents leaving to relinquish their pets to a kill shelter.”

But the bill that LA politicians are pushing is not stopping the total collapse of the economy.  A gingerbread house, located in an alley, which sold last year for $500,000 dollars, was recently sold for a mere $45,000 dollars.  Reports across the lame state of California suggest this is only the beginning.

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