Brazil Bitcoin

At the start of COP26 in Glasgow, many leaders from around the world met to fight against climate change. When the talks first began, many were optimistic there would be swift changes in a fight against the evils of fossil fuels. President Joe Biden even stated, “I will stop climate change like I stopped Trump from becoming president.”

As other leaders took the stage the President of Brazil, Jair Bolsonaro, had some interesting statements.

“The rainforest is a horrible and disgusting place. My goal is to cut it all down and thousands of bitcoin farms on the vacant land. Bitcoin is going to the moon and I am all in.”

The Associated Press reported that many in the audience gasped when they heard this statement. The president then went on to continue talking about the economy of Brazil and how COVID-19 has affected the nation’s ability to thrive.

“I am going to ramp up bitcoin mining to levels not seen. We will burn down all of the trees and the stupid little animals that live in them. Not only will this act of generosity kill all of the snakes (gross) but we will never run out of toilet paper ever again. Bitcoin mining will then become the key growth industry for Brazil. Screw climate activists. Get money or die trying.”

Bolsonaro was then reported to pass out from drinking too much vodka and soda water.