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Shocking: You Can’t Rip A Line Of Coke Off A Stripper With A Rolled Up Bitcoin

Bitcoin stripper

Over the past month bitcoin has rallied from $10,000 to over $17,000.  Soon it will be approaching the historical high of $19,650 where it went in 2017 before collapsing on unsuspecting retail investors.  But despite the recent run up in the speculative cryptocurrency there is one thing that has held millions back from purchasing it.  The reason?  You can’t rip a fat line of coke off a stripper with a rolled up bitcoin.

It just isn’t theoretically possible.  A bitcoin is a string of code on the internet.  It’s not physical.  You can’t touch it.  You can’t taste it.  And you can’t rail a crushed up Xanax with a rolled up bitcoin off a stripper.

The inability to blast a line straight to the face is the biggest bear thesis to bitcoin.  Sure, you can show everyone your cool invisible line of code.  Or brag how you can buy an unlimited weapon arsenal off the dark web.   You might even be able to buy a Russian bride with bitcoin.  But you’ll never rip a fat line off a strippers face.

A bitcoin will never become a fresh $100 dollar Benjamin.  You’ll never be able to drop a bitcoin in a strippers G-string.  You’ll never be able make love on a pile bitcoins you won in Vegas with a toothless lady you met at the bar.  And you’ll never be able rip a fat line off your boyfriends flaccid hog.