Columbus, Ohio – A white Tesla was reported to have left its owners garage early this morning and proceeded to crash into a black family of four. The Tesla then exploded on the spot taking firefighters three hours to put out.
Tesla investors cheered shooting the price target up 5% when the stock market opened. “This is a remarkable development with Tesla’s self-driving technology,” Tesla fanboy Sawyer Merrett stated. “My new price target for Tesla is now $50,000. I arrived at this price target by realizing that police stations across America will begin using self-driving Tesla’s to kill more innocent black folk.”
Following the tragic event, Elon Must took to twitter stating, I think the family who died in the crash are looking down smiling at this great dip buying opportunity we have. It’s a great day for them.”