RECENT ARTICLES
AOC Dress Designer, Aurora James, Tests Positive for COVID-19, Blames ‘Relentlessly...
Aurora James has had quite a week, after making headlines as the designer behind Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s Met Gala, ‘Tax the Rich’ gown.
In an interview...
Tesla Subsidiary “2nd Best” Releases DIY Fracking Units; Bringing Nat. Gas...
Like its parent corporation before it, 2nd Best has gotten out ahead of other disruptors and released a first-of-its-kind DIY Home Based Natural Gas...
Goldman Sachs CEO Passes Away Following Heart Attack During Meeting About...
Goldman Sachs CEO, David Solomon, has passed away at 59 after being explained what an NFT is by a junior analyst during a meeting....
Moderna Tells People Complaining About Contaminated Vaccines to Fuck Off
Moderna may be one of the biggest ‘Sigma male’ companies in the pharmaceutical industry after telling people who were injected with doses contaminated with...
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MUST READ
AOC Dress Designer, Aurora James, Tests Positive for COVID-19, Blames ‘Relentlessly Coughing’ Governor
Aurora James has had quite a week, after making headlines as the designer behind Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s Met Gala, ‘Tax the Rich’ gown.
In an interview...
Tesla Subsidiary “2nd Best” Releases DIY Fracking Units; Bringing Nat. Gas Exploration to the...
Like its parent corporation before it, 2nd Best has gotten out ahead of other disruptors and released a first-of-its-kind DIY Home Based Natural Gas...
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INVESTING
“Apes together strong” declared a racist dog-whistle by the Southern Poverty...
Montgomery, AL – Civil rights advocacy group and racism watchdog the Southern Poverty Law Center issued a statement Thursday identifying several phrases used by...
Wobbling Moon could spell disaster for Meme Stocks GameStop and AMC
Honolulu, HI – A new report issued Wednesday projects that r/Wallstreetbets darlings' GameStop (NYSE: GME) and AMC (NYSE: AMC) trips to the Moon could...
MACROECONOMICS
OPINOIN
STOCKS
“Apes together strong” declared a racist dog-whistle by the Southern Poverty...
Montgomery, AL – Civil rights advocacy group and racism watchdog the Southern Poverty Law Center issued a statement Thursday identifying several phrases used by...
RELATED
Stock Tips On Big Tits Of The Day – Ashe
The Stonk Market's local investment professional, Ashe here with an explosive interview. Follower her on Twitter where she drops wonderful investment bombs and on OnlyFans...
POLITICS
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis Set to Legalize Meth in Move to...
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis has set forth a motion to legalize methamphetamine the drug of choice for people of Floridan. Governor DeSantis thinks this...
Disneyland to add homeless tent city to California Adventure Park
ANAHEIM, CA – Disneyland Resorts announced the latest addition to their California Adventure Park Wednesday. “Skid Row Land” promises to complete the California experience...
REAL NEWS
REAL STATE
BlackRock celebrates LGBTQ+ pride month by increasing single-family home rents 30%
NEW YORK, NY – The world’s largest asset manager announced support for the LGTBQ+ equality movement Thursday by ratcheting up rent an average of...
ENERGY
Rising Gas Prices Decried As “Racist, Classist, Sexist, Capitalist Evil”
Gas prices have risen dramatically in the last 2 months. Everyone is feeling the pain of pump prices. Blue checks on twitter, often considered the most educated and knowledgeable people in the country, have...
Continental Resources launches SPAC to purchase the state of North Dakota
BISMARK, N.D. – Petroleum and natural gas producer Continental Resources (NYSE: CLR) announced the formation their newest venture, DRILL, a Special Purpose Acquisition Company with the stated goal of acquiring the entire state of...
Hunter Biden Uses Department Of Energy Funds To Pay Gambling Debts, Texas Freezes
A source that has requested to remain anonymous has informed The Stonk Market that Hunter Biden has diverted $450 Million from the department of energy to repay various gambling debts. Hunter, an avid badminton...
FICTION
If you get a text from this number never respond to it!
If you get a text from this number (1-737-217-6397) don’t ever respond to it. I am begging you don’t respond to it! Delete it...
A Warm Introduction to Patrick
I wake up every morning with a stiff one. Rock hard. Solid. The room is usually cold. I like it brisk in my penthouse.
My...
Alternative Ending to the Original Pokémon Games – Blue’s Suicide
Source of feature image: Amino Apps
We all know that theory in the Red and Blue Pokémon games where Blue’s Raticate dies.
It goes as follows:
Red...
The Pokémon Episode that gave kids Seizures: The dark secrets of what really happened
On December 16th, 1997, DennÅ Senshi Porygon, more commonly referred to as Cyber Solider Porygon, was broadcasted in Japan. The episode was infamous for...
The Deformed Man
I was in my last year of law school working as a paralegal. I worked in Downtown Chicago. Right in the Loop at a...
