Landlords renters
Source: Reddit

Landlords are the greatest people to exist and have been rated some of the best human beings on the planet.  We wholly agree.  Landlords provide one of the best services in the world – housing.  Without landlords the world would be destroyed by nukes.  With that being said, here are 15 reasons why landlords are better human beings than renters.

  1. Landlords have more money. More money equals better human beings.
  2. Landlords use depreciation to avoid taxes.  Renters pay full income taxes like a chump. Less money paid in taxes the better citizen you are.
  3. Renters buy stupid things like Funko Pops thinking they are an investment.  Landlords steal Funko Pops and resell them on eBay when the renter can’t pay rent.
  4. Renters donate half of their net worth ($300 dollars) to Bernie Sanders thinking they are fighting the system.  Landlords invest $300 dollars into a cardboard box and rent it to a single mother for $500/month.
  5. Landlords smell like great American capitalism.  Renters smell like stale trash.
  6. Landlords have to burn down their houses to collect massive insurance check when renters don’t pay.  Renters have to find new place to live when they don’t pay rent and their home burns down.
  7. Landlords get to borrow at 3% rate from banks then line their pockets from rentoid W2. Renters spend 75% of their income on rent and the remaining 25% on Funko Pops.
  8. The nice town folks will throw an annual parade for landlords for providing a nice place for people to live annually.  Renters will protest these parades out of jealousy.
  9.  Landlords have to do the hard job of increasing the rent every month then keeping the security deposit.  Renters cry crocodile tears.
  10. Landlords get to wear a top hat when they kick single mothers on the street.  Renters use flat billed hats as wall decoration in your unit.
  11. Landlords get tipped 15-25% of rent every month by their renters for providing such a great service.  Renters are forced to tip.
  12. Landlords have the ability to eat Funko Pops when their renters don’t pay rent.  Renters cry.
  13. Landlords are allowed to blast their favorite songs about having lots of money when evicting non-paying single mothers.  Renters cry.
  14. Landlords can steal pets as leverage when their renters don’t pay rent.  Renters are forced to pay rent.
  15. When a 87 year-old renter leaves their medicine cabinet unlocked you can go in their and take their medicine for fun.
Landlords renters
Source: Reddit



26 COMMENTS

  1. Are you fucking kidding me. This is the type of bs you write up. I hope you choke on your fucking funko pops you pos probably democratic pos. I wish I could run into your stupid ignorant ass in the fucking streets so I could slap you like the fucking snobby cunt that you are. Have a fucked up day and I hope you burn in hell..

  2. You must be a scumbag landlord that preys on single mothers who bust there asses to make it in this fucked up world. I was raised by a single mother who rented and I can tell you right now that I am twice the person you will ever be. I really wish you the worst of luck and hope you crash your fucking Mercedes on the way home today…

  3. I agree with Eloise, I make sure there are mice in all of my decrepit tenement buildings so I can charge the mice rent in addition to my subhuman tenants. If a tenant pays with direct deposit, sometimes when they die I put draft blockers around their door so the smell doesn’t get out and I can keep charging them rent and then sue their estate for destruction of my property via decomposition. I like the old tenants best because they are too frail to know that I’ve quadrupled their rent. If they can’t pay, I know a couple cheap hitmen and keep charging them rent after they’re good and dead.

  4. As a landlord and copy writer myself, it sounds like you just let anyone move in to your properties. My tenants are people too you know, maybe if you treated them as such you wouldn’t have so many issues.

    Thanks for putting effort into further expanding the economic divide, you truly are a greedy sack of incompetent garbage.

  5. This is the type of BS that takes of space on the website when there should be some important information telling us ABOUT a freaking cure to this damn Covid19 that has taken over the country. Write something worth reading ABOUT cause this ain’t hitting on sh*t.

  6. Wow…. indecent human beings to the fullest. Great example on how a person should not act just pure evil..I wish I can say there is a special part in hell for you but I dont believe in such fairy lands but Wish I could be there to see your judgement😂 and a lot of what you wrote may protein to you but not everyone..so good luck with your pity party must not be enjoying life to much to write something so hateful..bc happy ppl dont say stuff like this sorry you believe your lies🙏ASÉ

  7. this is hilarious. Dave Portnoy is stealing your act though. He is not close to as funny though. Keep it up, thanks for the laughs

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