Image by John R Perry from Pixabay

Social Justice Warriors unite! I have found the solution to the ever-relevant issue of economic inequality. For decades, politicians have been demanding reparations for those affected by slavery and now is the time to act. The solution has been right under our feet this whole time.

If the government were ever to facilitate reparations, the time is now and the currency is light, sweet crude oil. I know what you’re thinking and yes this is insane, but this is a multifaceted scenario in which nobody loses.

The US Government should immediately enter negotiations with the struggling upstream energy sector to turn the faucet back on. The obvious first effect – hard working men and women across the country return to oil patch and executives can afford to pay themselves massive “performance incentives”. This is where it gets interesting.

The resulting influx of black gold will decimate the price of oil, making it an absolute steal for the federal government purchase with money created from thin air. The latest figure for reparations I’ve seen has been approximately $300,000 per family affected.

For the sake of this argument, let’s suppose Donald can purchase said oil for $10/bbl and we expect the coming recovery over the next eighteen months to result in $50/bbl. Donald spends $60,000 per family and by the end of 2022 (maybe) the recipients will be swimming in cash as they liquidate their 6,000 barrels of oil.

If all goes well, why stop at reparations? Welfare, unemployment and Medicaid could all benefit from such innovative thinking. This is a modern monetary masterpiece.